March 18th, 2009
March exercise—day eighteen— My contacts in the Transportation Cabinet invited me to make myself at home in the Planning Division for much of today, so I had an usual taste of what it might be like to experience the kind of day I’d have if I worked in the state capital. I got back to Danville in time for a 20-mile bike outing, which made for a solid day of “all things bicycle.”
Today’s sight bite— Dark birds at full wingspan —c-l-i-c-k— riding the updrafts against the entire Frankfort skyline.
Tomorrow— Back in the studio…
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March 17th, 2009
March exercise—day seventeen— From a walk at daybreak to my street-front work at dusk, today was as close to an ideal cycle as I am likely to achieve during this annual re-examination of conscious behavior. A disciplined, productive day of creative activity (organic pork branding), professional networking (gift shop consignments), and physical fitness (Dana’s first Pilates workout) fulfilled all the expectations of the M-X, including the need to internally defuse an unexpected, emotion-laden challenge that in the past might have thrown me out of balance for at least the remainder of the day.
Today’s sight bite— The dough men and assorted pastry makers dressed in rumpled white —c-l-i-c-k— visible from the Main Street window before dawn, arched intently over flour-dusted surfaces.
Tomorrow— A team-building mission to Frankfort…
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March 16th, 2009
March exercise—day sixteen— E. Tolle states, “When you don’t cover up the world with words and labels, a sense of the miraculous returns to your life.” But aren’t words what I do here? He adds, “A depth returns to your life. Things regain their newness, their freshness. And the greatest miracle is the experiencing of your essential self as prior to any words, thoughts, mental labels, and images.” Today I’m wondering what purpose it serves to make these daily entries. I suppose that’s why I refrained from log activity during my March-X one year ago, but I will continue the practice for the duration.
Today’s sight bite— Foaming swirls of analogous blues —c-l-i-c-k— as I break the surface with lungs aflame to visually freeze the digital characters.
Tomorrow— Inertia of the mature exercise…
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March 15th, 2009
March exercise—day fifteen— Made some decent progress on a new safari artwork and prepared two final-number engravings that I’ll send on approval to a print collector. Accidentally spent time in front of the tube watching an art history program on the KET-ED digital channel. Realized I must never forget to learn even more about the roots of modern art. It dovetailed with our recent viewing of The Rape of Europa, one of the best documentaries I’ve seen in a long time. Dana produced art in the kitchen with a another day of fine meals. As usual, I am the fortunate beneficiary.
Today’s sight bite— A Sunday invasion of workmen and their equipment —c-l-i-c-k— executing a belated but welcome pick-up of our ice-storm waste heaps.
Tomorrow— Second-half buzzer sounds…
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March 14th, 2009
March exercise—day fourteen— It’s a rule of thumb that it will rain whenever I need to deliver physical artwork, but I managed satisfactorily to get a new set of engravings over to the Art Center and also had my first chat with the incoming executive director. So, if you need it to rain in your town, just arrange a display of my artwork and that should take care of it. Not you, Brendan; I’m quite sure you get enough precipitation out there, although it would be cool to have some of my art make it to the west coast. I get ideas like that, but there’s often not a lot to back them up. Maybe I missed my chance when I was churning out some interesting collages while Ian was in L.A. Many ideas are fresh and I get right to them. Others hang around so long they become annoying, until I realize it’s me at whom I’m perturbed, for allowing them to rot, or, worse than that, I get sick and tired of chattering about them in my head without any action. Ideas like that are usually disavowed, or I just get fed up and finally proceed with one, invariably pushing away another newer, more stimulating notion that just stands there listening to the other one grumble, “Move aside, buster, I’ve got seniority.”
Today’s sight bite— A black and white print in a plastic holder on the wall, somehow seeming tiny and drab —c-l-i-c-k— but that’s my engraving featured next to the gift shop’s doorway.
Tomorrow— Avoid the lure of Sunday languor and prepare for an ambitious workweek…
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March 13th, 2009
March exercise—day thirteen— Nothing much to highlight, except that I did finish signing and numbering my two most recent limited editions of wood-engraving prints. A recent “email conversation” with one of America’s most impressive exemplars of the Arts and Crafts style yielded praise for my printmaking. That’s more than enough to keep my enthusiasm intact, but I know I can do even better. When I look at my work I tend to see the flaws. That’s constructive on the one hand, but I think it deters me from being more prolific. I would never want to lose the capacity for a self-critique, but there must be a reliable, practical way to surmount the hesitancy. Perhaps that’s why Brendan enforces his week-day display of creativity. Must we thus trick ourselves? Probably. Indeed, it may be the only way, until habit takes over.
Today’s sight bite— Too large to be called a Yorkie; too small to be called anything else —c-l-i-c-k— Bruce’s friend, Hoosier, negotiates the back steps on his 16th canine birthday.
Tomorrow— Nothing less than the full-fledged matrix…
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March 12th, 2009
March exercise—day twelve— The Graybeard Prospector combed his hair with a wagon wheel and grabbed the Medicine Woman for a productive “Business Over Coffee.” Looks like the two hit it off well with The Texan and his Saddle Lady during a fun, informative breakfast, even if they didn’t break camp with that sack o’ gold— dangit!
Today’s sight bite— A white blanket on the driveway, tinted to an odd warmth by street lamps —c-l-i-c-k— just the kind of olden-times “pack snow” sure to gladden the heart of a young fort designer.
Tomorrow— A scheduled late alarm to cure the deprivation…
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March 11th, 2009
March exercise—day eleven— The air had a noticeable bite as I walked to campus, so I welcomed it, knowing I usually feel tired at the beginning of “act two.” In the absence of enthusiasm, rituals must drive the momentum, enhanced by proven boosters—stimulative variety, forced incremental achievement, constrained creativity, doses of nature, and, of course, music.
Today’s sight bite— My Speedo tinted pool goggles —c-l-i-c-k— hanging from the same locker-room hook where I accidentally left them two weeks ago.
Tomorrow— A networking opportunity, plus another shot at the $900 door prize…
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March 10th, 2009
March exercise—day ten— I was pleased to find that new priorities were finally coming into alignment today. Summer-like weather and a multi-day forecast of showers compelled us to spend some of the afternoon raking and seeding the backyard. My lower back felt stable enough for me to participate in most of Marlene’s Pilates class and to put in some additional time at the gym. After 40 minutes of spinning, I felt like I hadn’t been on a bike in a year. Afterwards, Dana and I shared a dinner by candlelight to celebrate the 31st anniversary of our original date, discussing our recollections of life in the 70s. Her chicken prepared in sherry and sour cream was superb, and I selected a Belgian white brew to complement.
Today’s sight bite— The aged, once-spreading tree on campus that inspired my composition for “Boss’s Bucket” —c-l-i-c-k— now forever rendered by the ice storm a triple amputee.
Tomorrow— An ambitious checklist and my first appointment with the pool in 14 days…
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March 9th, 2009
March exercise—day nine— Where did the day go? Still trying to achieve the level of focus that makes this exercise worthwhile. Probably the most interesting conversation of the day was with the Lieutenant. We brainstormed about having my friend Eric come up from Franklin for a concert early this summer. From the time Eric created “Cooler” in 1999, I hoped for another CD from him with the same innovative blend of mellow reverence and uplifting energy. I was delighted to learn about “The Jazz in Me,” and invited Dan to check out the new disc. I think this music is perfect for a fundraising concert or community outreach event. I’ve probably written about Eric here before. Dana arranged for him to play at my 50th birthday party. His jazzy tunes are laid back but buoyant, and his improvisational gifts have clearly reached new heights.
Today’s sight bite— A balding Walie, tugging at the leash —c-l-i-c-k— as if she’d forgotten everything I taught her about the proper way to take a neighborhood stroll.
Tomorrow— Perhaps enough physical progress to attempt a Pilates session…
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March 8th, 2009
March exercise—day eight— Dadbo would have relished seizing a weekend like this for a constructive jump on spring, and now, as I type this entry after dark, that pleasant bubble of exotic air is being shoved aside by severe weather. Dana and I enjoyed our morning walk past the marina, out to the abandoned island resort, but we shared a desire to have hiked in a setting which might’ve done better justice to the unseasonably warm day. Nevertheless, the steep hills gave our hearts an overdue workout, in addition to the panoramic views of Herrington Lake.
Today’s sight bite— The squirrel, positioned under our damaged porch eave —c-l-i-c-k— balanced on a rotting slat like a springboard diver.
Tomorrow— Volunteer consultations kick off a week of diverse projects…
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March 7th, 2009
March exercise—day seven— Not unlike many other people, most of the day was spent out of doors, capturing the mild weather. My lower back complained like a cranky teenager, but I was eager to tie up the loose ends of yard clean-up. The next rain will set the stage for lawn seeding, and I needed to clear away the last of the limb debris. How’s that for an exciting log entry? We ended the evening with a viewing of Eastwood’s Changeling. His color palette was handsome and the period look convincing, but an effective mood never coalesced for me, as with Mystic or Baby. I was ready to move on before it was over. Clint, it’s time to give Paul Haggis a call.
Today’s sight bite— Red bird perched on the stub of a butchered tree —c-l-i-c-k— singing as if there were no more frozen mornings ahead.
Tomorrow— An effort to guide the exercise toward imaginative waters…
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March 6th, 2009
March exercise—day six— When the corner video store can tell you every movie you’ve ever rented there, and a vast enterprise like Amazon can process and recall each product you may have momentarily drooled over in front of your monitor, there is absolutely no excuse for a hospital not making readily available—and for not enforcing—a list of medications that will cause known danger to a particular patient, especially when just such an allergy list has been provided to it on more than one occasion. My conclusion is not that it can’t; the shameful circumstance is that it apparently won’t. Incredible as it seems, Bruce has recovered enough to be released today. I shall do everything within my power to see that he never spends another minute under the care of that institution.
Today’s sight bite— Bruce seated at his favorite spot on the couch —c-l-i-c-k— laughing when I prescribe a dose of Patrick McGoohan.
Tomorrow— Return to the full-blown exercise…
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March 5th, 2009
March exercise—day five— Improvements were recognized today on all fronts, but I don’t think I shall personally feel 100% for a bit more time. Bruce was doing a newspaper puzzle (a most welcome sign), but seems more concerned with solving the riddle of his unexpected plunge into such a perilous state. Brendan sent a heartwarming note of support. The County Judge and I secured an appointment in the state capital to visit with Transportation Cabinet people. Attended the reception at the Arts Center, learned more from David F about getting introduced to an art buyer, and met a very good pastel artist from Lexington. After that, Dana went to the New York Philharmonic performance with our Russian friend, Irina, another exceptionally creative individual.
Today’s sight bite— Bruce in his demeaning hospital garb —c-l-i-c-k— sitting on the edge of his bed in conversation with an ever-faithful mother.
Tomorrow— A new attempt at imposing the exercise…
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March 4th, 2009
March exercise—day four— Spent most of the day in bed with some sort of relapse into flu-like symptoms. On top of it, my sore back feels no better than yesterday. I didn’t make it over to the hospital. Dana reported that Bruce recognized her, wept, and wanted to come home. Things are moving in the right direction at last.
Today’s sight bite— Silhouettes of treetops visible through my window —c-l-i-c-k— like a cut-paper illustration, with the diagonal slashes of ice-broken limbs disturbing the composition.
Tomorrow— Hope for improved well-being…
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March 3rd, 2009
March exercise—day three— (Dear Back, You picked a great time to act up again. Please knock it off and return my mobility. Your friend, John.) The probable result of a 24-hour dose of stress, my lower back has treated me with an unexpected spasm when I bent over to work on a snarl of power cords. Bruce is doing slightly better after they moved a dialysis unit into his ICU chamber, but he still doesn’t recognize his visitors. Mombo sent out a nice prayer request.
Today’s sight bite— The high-resolution digital television picture —c-l-i-c-k— that is a result of solid professional know-how.
Tomorrow— I have absolutely no idea what Wednesday will bring…
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March 2nd, 2009
March exercise—day two— If you want to watch the day blow a gasket, try imposing a rigid framework on it. We were at the hospital by midmorning, after learning that Bruce had been transferred to critical care in a state of acute delirium. I had to break away and respond to the County Judge Executive, who sought an immediate consultation on pressing “bicycle matters.” Have I actually become the local “go-to guy” on those issues? By the end of the day, it’s clear to us that Bruce is having an adverse reaction to medications he should not have been given—but nobody connected with his care seems willing to admit the obvious.
Today’s sight bite— The incomparable, gradient ultramarine of a pre-sunrise sky —c-l-i-c-k— crenelated from below by the jutting shapes of downtown commercial structures.
Tomorrow— Juggling the rituals of heightened awareness with the breaking developments of family crisis…
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March 1st, 2009
March exercise—day one— One would think that I’d be completely familiar with February’s annual habit of ducking out early, but it caught me by surprise again this year, and now the March Exercise is upon me before the full preliminaries are complete. Surely the highlight of the day was our meeting in Lexington with K&KK about their wedding ideas and plans. More than an invitation design, this will be an opportunity to collaborate on introducing the thematic impression of what is certain to be a classy, memorable event.
Today’s sight bite— The “evening star,” in all her naked splendor, poses proudly above the urban competitors —c-l-i-c-k— and I almost convince myself that I can see her tiny crescent with the bare eye.
Tomorrow— With Monday-morning appropriateness, details of the regimen are put into effect…
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February 23rd, 2009
After a miserable weekend of single combat against a determined viral foe, I felt recovered enough to wrap in a blanket and watch the Academy Awards telecast. What a disappointment! The Oscars have less and less to do with my personal affinities as a life-long movie fanatic. In my peculiar world, it would’ve been fitting for the program to have ended with a clip of Taylor’s final cry from Planet of the Apes— “Damn you! God damn you all to hell!”

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February 20th, 2009
“Death is at all times solemn, but never so much so as at sea. A man dies on shore; his body remains with this friends, but when a man falls overboard at sea and is lost, there is a suddenness in the event, and a difficulty in realizing it, which give to it an air of awful mystery.”
—Richard Henry Dana, Jr.
Two Years Before the Mast
We navigate in a sea of souls…
Grim reality has a way of sweeping aside all the self-absorbing trivialities that clog a journal like this, but rather than ask myself — “What’s the point of it all?” — why not scratch ahead with a continued search for meaning? Maybe for me. Maybe for you. Maybe, maybe not. If I stopped believing it worth a try, this would be my final post.
Not long after the bulk of our community had shaken off the surprise of our shared crisis, most of us were shocked to learn that the life of a respected local leader had been tragically lost. If his name was added to the list of Kentucky’s weather-related deaths, it is unknown to me, but what is clear is that he was found in a vacant house where he’d been working with a generator. The coroner said the circumstances were consistent with carbon monoxide poisoning. It was a mild day. He wasn’t attempting to heat the building. People speculated that the wind blew the door shut while he was operating a sump pump. The precise circumstances remain a puzzle. I didn’t know anyone active in town affairs that didn’t consider him a friend. He covered the leadership bases—from business to social service. He made multiple trips to the Gulf Coast as a volunteer to help with the Katrina response. He was highly intelligent, compassionate, and knew how to do almost anything. The Chamber of Commerce named him “outstanding citizen” over fifteen years ago, but he never slowed down. He took to his grave an unmatched knowledge of the County’s industrial development history and infrastructure. He was the last of a breed of quiet men who had made a truly significant difference. The abrupt vacancy was painfully felt. I spent two hours in line to offer his family a few words that wouldn’t sound trite. I’m not sure that I succeeded.
I didn’t attend the funeral the next day, but paid a visit with my friend Danny to the Abbey of Gethsemani. It was my first time there. It was raining and in many respects would have been considered a dismal day, but others were also making the same pilgrimage, and I found a sense of peace in the setting that defied personal understanding. God is everywhere, but keenly present in some places, and that suggests to me the appropriate use of the word “sacred.” We also stopped at the Saint Rose church in Springfield to meet Father Murray, and I had my first look at the extraordinary Bavarian-style windows. Father Murray is extraordinary, too. At age 87, he looked to me to be in his mid 70s. He told me, “Well, I’ve always gotten a lot of exercise.” He pointed out 70-year-old trees damaged in the ice storm that he helped plant when he was a novice. The seminary was moved east long ago and the associated buildings demolished, but the church remains, a splendid structure full of artistic treasures, including a 13-figure Last Supper and a 12-figure Pentecost, all wood carved in the Italian fashion. Danny wanted to show me the Convent near Loretto and to check on any damage to the outdoor Way of Sorrows. It was evident that huge limbs from the tall grove of surrounding trees had crashed all about, but the only casualty was The Crucifixion. We marveled that each figure of Our Lady had escaped harm, but that “Christ took the hit.”
Several days before, Joan had an opportunity to meet Danny when he joined Joan, Dana, and me at the Hub for coffee after one of Hayley’s high-scoring victories. It was another meaningful, in-depth discussion about heavy subjects. Joan thought she might have intruded and skewed the conversation. Nothing could be further from the truth. Danny told be later he was pleased to meet her and said that my sister was a “strong soul.” He is correct, of course, but I’ve already known that for some time. Danny is quite a soul himself. The word I would use is “magnanimous.” Yesterday he brought over his pole saw and tied himself to my chimney so he could deal with the big branches that were still jack-knifed on our rooftop. One of his earliest memories is watching his father top trees as a lumberjack in the high Sierras. He seems to have the right tool for everything and knows how to use them safely. I can’t say how much I appreciate that in two hours of work together, his generous favor of skill has saved me hundreds of dollars in tree-service fees (or maybe more, from what I’ve heard around town about what people have been charged since the storm).
So, with power now restored for Mombo and Clan Valley and the last of my storm-related headaches resolved, can I say that circumstances have returned to normal? “Not hardly,” as the expression goes. I think I’m battling the same virus that put Bruce back in the hospital yesterday with pneumonia. We’re sleeping on the floor because we made the blunder of giving away our old mattress before FedEx delivered the complete replacement set (and, wouldn’t you know it, they lost part of it). I have no complaints. Things are picking up in the studio, and I have a fun project to work on with KK & K. It’s time to put the Crash Bucket away and begin preparing for the March Exercise.
Posted in Angst, Art, Blogging, Bruce, Caitlan, Community, Crashology, Dana, Death, Exercise, Family, Friends, Gratitude, Home, Joan, Mombo, Nonfiction, Saints, Sport, Studio, Technology | No Comments »
February 1st, 2009
“A well man at sea has little sympathy with one who is sea-sick; he is too apt to be conscious of a comparison favorable to his own manhood.”
—Richard Henry Dana, Jr.
Two Years Before the Mast
Seven Deadly Zins
Lee fixed an elaborate, delicious dinner last night, and my plate’s fare was more than I could finish. The Harrisons broke bread with us, too, and then left for a Norton Center performance. They’re still based at a motel, so that tells me Gose Pike remains off the grid. Access to David’s laptop provided an opportunity for us to glance at our growing accumulation of email. I could merely glance at Caitlan’s request that I design the invitation for her year-end wedding. And after that, the big news: Bruce called to let us know our power was back on—at last. We relaxed with Appaloosa for an encore viewing and then gratefully returned to a gradually warming house.
When the ordeal is over, a strange kind of pride or sense of self-congratulation comes alarmingly easy. While others foundered, panicked, or were just plain clueless, if one was in a position to rely on prior judgments and preparations, there can be a satisfaction that is not entirely admirable, because it too easily creates a comforting detachment from those who are still suffering, from those who are still counting the days. Somewhere in the heart is a motivation to move beyond protecting immediate family to a more general community outreach, but the longed-for end to personal crisis brings too strong a desire for the return to ordinary living.
And how smooth it can be to slip into that “new era of normalcy” without also seeing the experience as a call to greater preparedness. True, there seems to be an ongoing series of natural disasters distributed here and there, and this could be seen simply as “our turn” and to say, “All’s well that ends well.” But is it more astute to count blessings without losing a sense of guarded optimism, keeping one eye on the potential for more of the same or worse? Or perhaps that’s the unbroken “crashologist” within—my inner “doom-and-gloom-er” who needs to keep his powder dry and the gas tank on F.
Posted in Angst, Bruce, Caitlan, Community, Crashology, Family, Food, Friends, Gratitude, Home, Movies, Nonfiction, Priorities, Psychology, Wine | No Comments »
January 31st, 2009
“It is not the least of the advantages of allowing sailors occasionally a day of liberty, that it gives them a spring, and makes them feel cheerful and independent, and leads them insensibly to look on the bright side of everything for some time after.”
—Richard Henry Dana, Jr.
Two Years Before the Mast
HITCH—Can I finish my coffee first? COLE—You surely may.
Terie’s power was restored last night, so all of us ate dinner at her place in Junction City and watched the Ed Harris picture, Appaloosa. (Superb western!) Terie fixed me up with a replacement mobile phone before we left. Even though KU has declared our residence restored, there was no power when we got home, but things seemed a bit more tolerable, just for having been in a warm, functional space for a few hours. Dana and I shifted our sleeping arrangements to the downstairs room in front of the gas grate. I was restless most of the night, until early morning, although probably better off than I would have been on the frigid second level.
Worked outside today on the “endless” expanse of fallen limbs—slow progress without a chain saw. I talked to Bill, our business neighbor, and, although he still had no power at his Parksville residence, he discovered he had electricity in his law office across the street. Dana got through to the light company again and informed them of our status. The CPAs next door are still without power, too, and, since we’re both connected to the same utility pole, all we can do is wait for someone to show up to fix it. Ruined limbs are visibly putting pressure on the line. Bill thinks that might have triggered something.
Dana is anxious to get out of the house, so we’ve decided to use the locker rooms at Centre, find an open restaurant, and then spend the evening at Lee and David’s, not knowing what we’ll come back to. Bruce went to Terie and Marty’s, so we’re shutting off the gas and leaving for the evening—with our fingers crossed.
Posted in Bruce, Community, Crashology, Dana, Family, Friends, Home, Marty, Movies, Nonfiction, Technology, Terie | No Comments »