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Segue frenzy!

July 30, 2003 /

While I was looking up IMDB stuff for Ms. D____ just now, I noticed that one of her newest roles is the lead in a film adaptation of Shopgirl. I picked that book up for a dollar at the same time as Microserfs and read it just afterward, so that caught my attention.

I can’t assume that anybody out there has actually read Shopgirl, because I don’t recall it doing spectacular business and I doubt it would have seen print if not for its author’s celebrity. Steve Martin plots well and his jokes are rare but good, but a) nobody actually prints standalone novellas and b) it’s pretty lame prose. He’s a comedy writer, not a novelist, so he apparently never learned things like “show, don’t tell.”

That said, the book will probably translate well to a movie, I applaud the casting of Jimmy Fallon as Jeremy, and it’s kind of cool that Martin’s writing the screenplay himself. But even without knowing the plot, doesn’t anybody else find it a little weird that he’s cast himself as a romantic lead opposite Claire Danes?

Warning: You might think this is a little gross.

July 30, 2003 /

I spent a lot of time outdoors in the woods this past weekend, and only discovered Monday night the wealth of bug bites this had bestowed upon me. Naturally, they were all in (shall we say) a couple of delicate, sensitive and well-covered areas. Like right under my socks.

“Ah,” I thought, “bug bites. Fortunately I don’t scratch bug bites, because I have willpower!”

I believed that, too. What I didn’t count on was all the walking and bicycling and shoe-wearing I get to do in the summer, and the fact that I have to dress up for work now. By the time I got home last night, I was no longer mentally fit to stand trial. Black socks get hot, and they chafe.

At last, I tore off the beastly things and went at my ankles like a crazed badger. It was glorious, ecstatic, full-body pleasure; it was sex with a thousand Claires. I have no regrets.

I’m paying for it now, of course, but I have willpower again. I know I can resist. And most importantly, today I’m wearing white socks.

July 30, 2003 /

Maria emailed and told me to “have a great day downloading Japanese characters,” which makes it sound like I’m putting lots of little anime people on my work computer. I was going to clarify that, but then I was like no, let them wonder. So wonder!

July 30, 2003 /

I tried to download Japanese text support here at work just now, not so much because I read a lot of Japanese but because having the module would make it quit yelling at me whenever I try to read Megatokyo. I got this error message:

Unable to download at this time. The internet may be busy.

Come on now. That’s not even trying!

Leonardr like lightning!

July 28, 2003 /

Says Mister Crummy, regarding this last entry:

“The obvious thing that comes to my mind is ‘3001’ by Arthur C. Clarke, which is an awful book but which features, among other things, tame, semi-intelligent velociraptors who do menial tasks like gardening. This is just an incidental detail which is not important to the story, but it’s portrayed as a good deal for everyone including the no-longer-extinct dinosaurs…

Another one is David Brin’s Uplift series, in which one type of genetic engineering (making semi-intelligent species fully intelligent) is seen as a social good and a duty. Some of the characters in the books are genetically engineered chimps and dolphins.

If a piece of technology is central to a science fiction story then usually something has to go wrong or the technology has to be abused in some way, or there’s no story. I like Brin because he’s good at coming up with different drivers for conflict.”

He’s right, and that’s a common weakness of science fiction: Neat Idea Syndrome. My Creative Writing visiting professor, Nancy Zafris, told me when asked that yes, SF did have a pretty low standing within her literary circles.

“Why?” I asked. “There’s so much vibrant, progressive fiction out there.”

“I don’t know,” she said, distastefully. “It just always seems like there’s a problem, so they have to… do something with the computer, and that’s the end.”

Which you know is ridiculous, if you’ve ever read SF, but it does make a point: Neat Idea SF exists, and it’s perceived by the casual reader as a) all the same and b) boring. The casual reader is pretty much right, when the story doesn’t involve you with a character. When it gets down to it, a Neat Idea may catch your fancy, but eventually humans are only interested in reading about themselves.

So yeah, now I want to read David Brin, because what Leonard says makes him sound like exactly the right kind of character-focused writer. Unfortunately, my current bedside reading pile is staggering. I went to the library again tonight, with my newly repaired bike tires, and picked up yet more of my reserved books (Frank Miller, Diana Wynne Jones, Rob Thomas). I’m going to have to get a new box when I move on Friday just to keep my library stuff in. Is there a twelve-step program for this kind of thing?

July 28, 2003 /

It occurs to me that the one thing most of my favorite science fiction authors share is an intense dislike of science. Maybe it was different back in the hard-SF technotopia days, I don’t know, but I can’t actually remember reading a book involving a future where science makes things better. Seriously, can you think of two sci-fi stories in which genetic engineering, for example, is portrayed as anything but horrible?

July 28, 2003 /

I’m contemplating the purchase of a 27-inch television. Why? It’s not like I ever watch TV. I’ve watched maybe three hours of actual TV all summer, plus I had it on one of those music channels for an hour once. I have a small-but-select movie collection, but I don’t watch those much either.

Yet I’m probably going to get this thing. My budget is $200, and with the Wal-Mart gift certificate I got from one of my uncles at graduation, that one comes in just under the line. Plus it’s flat-screen, which I also generally don’t care about. Again, why am I doing this?

Because a big, flat screen allows you to more effectively engage in four-player Halo. That’s really the only reason.

Man, I hope Mom forgets to check this.

July 27, 2003 /

Brendan:

I need a journal entry for tonight so I don’t have a blank spot in my calendar. Give me an idea.

Maria
(phone):

Um… I don’t know? This is why I don’t have a journal.

Brendan:

But you should!

M:

If I had a journal it would be made up of random snippets of conversation. Out of context.

B:

You’d have a quote log!

M:

I think quote logs are supposed to be funny.

B:

I just got an email from Mindy. I was hoping it was from my friend Mindy, but no.

M:

No?

B:

No, this is more “Girls In Heat Playing With Horse Studs.”

M:

Maybe Mindy is trying to give you a message.

B:

I’m so putting that in my journal.

M:

No! Don’t!

B:

*click*

July 25, 2003 /

It’s DONE: I have successfully categorized (frequently up to five times) every single blasted entry in the history of NFD. EVERY SINGLE ONE. Besides going through one month at a time and filing them all, this also included a second sweep through the entire thing to fill an important slot I didn’t think of until I was almost done (landmarks).

With that done, I’m going to my apartment* with Maria to take measurements, then we’re both heading to Richmond so that a) Maria can see my ancestral** home before Mom sells it and b) I can help Mom empty the house of objects so that she can sell it. I’m not actually very worked up about this. I moved out emotionally and mentally at the end of my junior year of high school; that summer I lived at GSP, and the summer after I lived in Brazil, and in between I lived in Erika’s car. Mostly I’m glad Mom found a good family for it. I hope they appreciate the trees.

So yeah, I’ll be home all weekend hawking the remnants of my childhood at The Yard Sale. Expect posts to drop precipitately, but not entirely. I’m pretty sure Mom isn’t selling the phones.

* Did I ever talk about our apartment hunt? Sufficient: It was long, it was hot, nobody in Louisville thinks having two bathrooms is important and we ended up with the first place we looked at. Which is great, but not cheap.

** Not actually “ancestral.” More like “built in 1989.”