is a blog by Brendan
Dear gentle reader: this blog has been operating continuously since I was a teenager. The writing below is at least a decade old. In that time every molecule of my body has been replaced, along with many foolish ideas and flighty beliefs. I want to keep some of those things public out of an honesty and humility I owe the world. I trust you to carry that context with you.
Heard in front of the elevators, on the way to lunch:
“He was getting sued for calling that woman ‘Nappy Roots,’ remember?” (laughter)
“Man, I want somebody to say something derogatory to me, so I can sue.”
“I say things to you all the time.”
“Yeah, but you don’t count. I want [the CEO]!”
Hey, I found another reason cell phones suck!
Overheard in an office nearby:
“Yeah, and then I’ll dial into the application over the web.”
Difficult, but not impossible, I guess.
While on hold with the cable company for half an hour last night:
“Hit a home run with Insight’s Double and Triple Play deals!”
Okay, now that’s impossible.
I tried to download Japanese text support here at work just now, not so much because I read a lot of Japanese but because having the module would make it quit yelling at me whenever I try to read Megatokyo. I got this error message:
Unable to download at this time. The internet may be busy.
Come on now. That’s not even trying!
I’m contemplating the purchase of a 27-inch television. Why? It’s not like I ever watch TV. I’ve watched maybe three hours of actual TV all summer, plus I had it on one of those music channels for an hour once. I have a small-but-select movie collection, but I don’t watch those much either.
Yet I’m probably going to get this thing. My budget is $200, and with the Wal-Mart gift certificate I got from one of my uncles at graduation, that one comes in just under the line. Plus it’s flat-screen, which I also generally don’t care about. Again, why am I doing this?
Because a big, flat screen allows you to more effectively engage in four-player Halo. That’s really the only reason.
Man, I hope Mom forgets to check this.
You can be inscrutable, but can you scrut anything? You can be ineffable, but can you actually be effed? (“I think you can in Europe.“)
MSN:
… The mastermind behind “Gothika” and Halle [Berry]’s glammed-down and physically demanding role is producer Joel Silver.
“She broke her arm in a very violent scene where she’s being restrained with restraints in a cell and she was fighting the restraints,” explained Silver.
That’s such a brilliant line. I couldn’t have come up with it myself, so I’m stealing it.
I should explain that the reason all these MSN headlines are popping up in here is because, after a year of getting my Hotmail via Outlook Express, I’m now suddenly being deluged with teaser headlines whenever I check it on the interweb here at work. The sheer dumbness of them is still a novelty. Trying to get people to read your insipid articles by putting teaser headline boxes under every sent mail confirmation is dumb too, but, well, obviously it works.