{"id":35,"date":"2007-02-15T02:19:10","date_gmt":"2007-02-15T07:19:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.xorph.com\/creator\/2007\/02\/15\/35\/"},"modified":"2007-02-15T02:19:10","modified_gmt":"2007-02-15T07:19:10","slug":"35","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/2007\/02\/15\/35\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<ol>\n<li> Do you own enough shit?<br \/>\n<blockquote>\n<form>\n<p><input type=\"radio\" disabled=\"true\" \/> YES<\/p>\n<p><input type=\"radio\" checked=\"true\" \/> NO<\/p>\n<\/form>\n<\/blockquote>\n<\/li>\n<li> Of course you don&#8217;t.  Get some more!  This is easy, because of Capitalism.\n<\/li>\n<li> GOTO 1\n<\/li>\n<li> Uh oh, it&#8217;s time to move!  You&#8217;d better pack all that up, drive it around, and carry it up stairs.  But your fleshy man-body is weak!  What will you do?\n<ul>\n<li><s>Hire professionals<\/s>\n<\/li>\n<li><s>Ask your friends for help, but pay them what you would pay professionals<\/s>\n<\/li>\n<li> Ask your friends for help, on Valentine&#8217;s Day, in eight-degree weather, and repay them with Mexican food that you didn&#8217;t even buy, your girlfriend did\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li>Wow, you&#8217;re kind of a bastard!  But at least all your shit is moved now.\n<\/li>\n<li>Wait!  You still have <i>more<\/i> shit to move!  How did that happen?  You&#8217;d better stay up until 3 am.  You can move the rest tomorrow!  I mean today!\n<\/li>\n<li> GOTO 4\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Thanks to Maria&#8217;s parents Mike and Susie, Scott, DC and Beth.  We owe you guys a hell of a lot more than those enchiladas.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you own enough shit? YES NO Of course you don&#8217;t. Get some more! This is easy, because of Capitalism. GOTO 1 Uh oh, it&#8217;s time to move! You&#8217;d better pack all that up, drive it around, and carry it up stairs. But your fleshy man-body is weak! What will you do? Hire professionals Ask [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,29,19,5,36],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-35","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-david-clark","category-maria","category-mild-lunacy","category-stress","category-x-night-ballers"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=35"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=35"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=35"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=35"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}