{"id":3301,"date":"2021-03-21T15:03:47","date_gmt":"2021-03-21T23:03:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/?p=3301"},"modified":"2021-03-21T15:03:47","modified_gmt":"2021-03-21T23:03:47","slug":"reverse-anniversary","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/2021\/03\/21\/reverse-anniversary\/","title":{"rendered":"Reverse Anniversary"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>As of yesterday we were supposed to be married.<\/p>\n<p>I didn\u2019t even want to wait that long, really. After <a href=\"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/2019\/12\/11\/one-of-the-most-important-moments-of-my-life-starring-an-oblivious-child\/\">I proposed<\/a>, Kat pointed out that a standard year of engagement and planning would put us right back in a Chicago winter, which offers logistical difficulties; I said, okay then, why can\u2019t we just go ahead and get married in the fall? But Kat\u2019s season is really summer. We settled on what is, often though not always, the first nice weekend in spring. We knew it was a gamble on the weather, but we didn\u2019t know quite what else the stakes comprised.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s very beautiful outside right now. That die came up lucky. But late in the summer of 2020, with no coherent leadership and no clear timeline for when it might be safe to see our loved ones again, we took a deep breath and told our ceremony venue, our reception venue, and our caterer to kick us down the road to March 2022 instead.<\/p>\n<p>There are few things I have ever wanted as much and as long as I have wanted to be married to Kat. I really hope this year won\u2019t be quite as long as the past one, but it won\u2019t be short. I\u2019ll be forty before my wedding instead of after. It\u2019s an arbitrary number, but it still brings home, to me, the cost of a lost year of one\u2019s life.<\/p>\n<p>Last night we got dressed up for a delivery dinner of fancy mushroom buns and congee, and Kat brought me a bouquet of flowers, surprising me the way she does every single time. Today we sat in the sun six feet from two of our closest Chicago friends and raised plastic cups of champagne. I still don\u2019t feel quite to the point where I can even start grieving our losses. But oh, God, despite our shaggy hair and hollow eyes and aching hearts, I feel the sheer luck by which we have stayed well and safe this long as a weight upon me too.<\/p>\n<p><a data-flickr-embed=\"true\" href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/brendanadkins\/51059615026\/in\/dateposted\/\" title=\"Love Me\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/live.staticflickr.com\/65535\/51059615026_e87478c08d_b.jpg\" width=\"683\" height=\"1024\" alt=\"Love Me\"><\/a><script async src=\"\/\/embedr.flickr.com\/assets\/client-code.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As of yesterday we were supposed to be married. I didn\u2019t even want to wait that long, really. After I proposed, Kat pointed out that a standard year of engagement and planning would put us right back in a Chicago winter, which offers logistical difficulties; I said, okay then, why can\u2019t we just go ahead [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,142,126,141,31],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3301","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-angst","category-chicago","category-joy","category-kat","category-landmarks"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3301","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3301"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3301\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3305,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3301\/revisions\/3305"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3301"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3301"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3301"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}