{"id":1237,"date":"2003-08-18T08:54:52","date_gmt":"2003-08-18T13:54:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.xorph.com\/creator\/2003\/08\/18\/the-badass-makeover-returns\/"},"modified":"2003-08-18T08:54:52","modified_gmt":"2003-08-18T13:54:52","slug":"the-badass-makeover-returns","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/2003\/08\/18\/the-badass-makeover-returns\/","title":{"rendered":"The Badass Makeover Returns"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I learned something today.  I learned that you can be an extremely nice, friendly Turkish guy at my job named Sevket (SHEV-ket), with almost girlishly pretty eyes and lips, a teddy-bear figure and a very normal haircut.  Then, you can go on vacation for a week, get a tan, shave your head and grow a goatee, and turn into <i>Kaiser fucking Soze<\/i>.<\/p>\n<p>Man, I wish I had a camera.  He&#8217;s still nice, there&#8217;s just all this terror overlaid on it now.  I was coming back from the break room with a bag of Doritos, and Sevket passed me and said &#8220;Hey, Brendan.  Early lunch?  Late breakfast?&#8221;  Then he smiled, and I had to make a conscious effort not to dive for the nearest cube and pray for it to be over.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I learned something today. I learned that you can be an extremely nice, friendly Turkish guy at my job named Sevket (SHEV-ket), with almost girlishly pretty eyes and lips, a teddy-bear figure and a very normal haircut. Then, you can go on vacation for a week, get a tan, shave your head and grow a [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[96],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1237","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-internships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1237","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1237"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1237\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1237"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1237"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/nfd\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1237"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}