When I was in fourth grade at St. Mark Elementary, a once-fine school now under the purview of fools, there was a pair of brothers a year or two older than me–both in the same grade. I don’t remember their names, which were pretty generic, like Joe and John or something. Also in their grade was a kid named Ricky, who pretty obviously had a learning disability.

Pretty much the only reason I remember these kids is that at lunch, most days, Joe and John would tease Ricky with essentially the same patter, day after day. I knew what they were doing was wrong, but I was very small and very timid, and anyway if I could hear what they were saying in that tiny lunchroom then so could the supervising adults.

The routine went something like this. Joe, the (much) larger brother, would lean over and mutter something in John’s ear. John, who did almost all the talking, would prod Ricky and ask him whether he liked a big’un.

Ricky would shake his head and laugh.

John would ask again, to see if Ricky was sure.

“Yeah,” Ricky would say, laughing harder. “Okay. Yeah. Yeah.”

Joe and John would laugh too. Sometimes John would turn and announce to the room that Ricky had confirmed his affection for a big’un.

John would continue the interview, asking Ricky to if he liked lamb fries.

Ricky, laughing louder and in exactly the same tone, would say “Yeah. Yeah. No. No I don’t.”

Ricky, John would repeat, do you like them lamb fries.

Ricky would laugh harder yet, the way people laugh when they think laughing is what they’re supposed to do. He would be laughing too hard to speak by now, so he’d just nod, up and down and up and down. Joe and John would exchange high fives.

I could tell by the tone of the participants that this was not a kind thing to do. I tried to imagine what big’uns and lamb fries could be; I came up with vague and unsettling and unhappy ideas. I didn’t understand the jokes, but I knew I would one day.

I’m twenty-four with Master’s degree and I have no idea what they were talking about.

Update 10.24.2005 1544 hrs: The Internet has informed me that lamb fries are fried lamb testicles, and that a big’un refers to, well, you can probably deduce that from context.

Thanks, the Internet.