Category: Internships

I ought to make a subcategory for these

The lady in the cube next to mine is pretty vicious with her voicemail system; I know this because she always uses it with her speakerphone on. It sounds like this:

CLICK TOOOOONE

BEEP BEEP BEEP

“Meridian Mail. Mailb–“

BEEP BOOP BEEP BEEP

“Passw–“

BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP

“One fifteen pm, June–“

BEEP

“You have one n–“

BEEP

“Hi, this is Gary with Midwest Accounts. It’s around ten till one, and I was just returning your–“

BEEP BEEP

“Message era–“

CLICK

The query still won’t run right. There are like five people on the database and I guess that’s just too much. I wish they’d leave. I’m going to have to come in on Saturday now.

I’m sitting here at work, killing time until 6:00, when most people will have gone home and I can actually try running my queries because the database won’t be so busy. The Interweb no longer entertains me, and I can’t think of anything interesting to write. I feel dried out and cold. It’s been a long day.

It will be nice to have this done, though (if it works), and not have it hanging over my head. Plus there’s a possibility of seeing Der Flöra tonight, and who knows what will happen over the weekend? There are a lot of people whose company I enjoy in Louisville right now; it’s June, and it’s about time I stopped getting enough sleep.

Ominous

Overheard just now, from the cube next to mine:

“It’s been a month now, and there’s been no kickback. And it’s like I was telling John earlier: we may have a problem here.”

If anybody knows why TSQL has ten thousand date formats and the ability to guess how much two words sound alike, but no capacity to find and remove one character from a string, please tell me.

I started back to work full time for the summer today, as if you can’t tell.

The lady in the cube next to mine would appear to be experiencing difficulties with her computer. This has been the soundtrack over the past couple of minutes:

BEEP BEEP

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

BEEP

(long pause)

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP

BEEP BEEP

BEEP BEEP

(softly) “Son of a… gun.

The microwave disappeared from the break room today, and lo and behold, behind it was a grimy “12TH FLOOR FIRST AID KIT.” I doubt anybody even knew it was there. If somebody had gotten frisky with the staple remover, we would have been forced to use mouse cords as crude tourniquets.

I wasn’t here (at work) at the time, but apparently this went out company-wide over email last Friday:

“A red Chevrolet Corsica, License #——, located in the east parking lot, has caught on fire. The owner of the vehicle has not shown up in the parking lot. If this is your vehicle, please see the property manager on the 4th floor or the security officer.”

Yes, over email.

Lady In The Next Cube must be having a rough day–she turned on the radio at 0900 and hasn’t turned it off since, which means that since the batteries are dead on my Discman, we both get to enjoy it. As I told Maria, I now understand that they really meant Soft Rock Music. All Day Long.

So yeah, basically I’ve spent the day trying to decide whether I could crash through the plate-glass window wall, and if the resulting fall would kill me. Soft Rock Hits. All Day Long. I didn’t think I was going to make it, but then–could it be? Yes!

I was saved by Wham!. Careless Whisper came on and revived my flagging spirits by reminding me of the BNL live cover to which Jon and I used to rock out in college. Glory be.

It was quickly erased by Sheryl Crow, of course, but still.

Pain is A-ALL YOU’LL FI-I-IND!