{"id":762,"date":"2004-05-27T08:30:47","date_gmt":"2004-05-27T13:30:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/2004\/05\/27\/ralph\/"},"modified":"2009-05-06T21:27:26","modified_gmt":"2009-05-07T05:27:26","slug":"ralph","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/2004\/05\/27\/ralph\/","title":{"rendered":"Ralph"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Belinda read a Cosmo-Sutra and now she&#8217;s obsessed with the dynamics of fucking.  She marks pages in books, working through them night by night:  &#8220;This looks interesting!&#8221;  she exclaims, and &#8220;No, tuck your <i>left<\/i> leg behind.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>She starts keeping a progress report with pleasure grades for each new arrangement.  Eventually, logically, she splits this into his-and-hers.  &#8220;After all,&#8221; she says, &#8220;it&#8217;s more accurate that way.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>It makes sense, and Ralph tells himself he&#8217;s lucky.  He can&#8217;t help but feel ashamed, though, looking at his weekly card and its column of failing grades.  He should try harder.  Belinda always gets straight As.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Belinda read a Cosmo-Sutra and now she&#8217;s obsessed with the dynamics of fucking. She marks pages in books, working through them night by night: &#8220;This looks interesting!&#8221; she exclaims, and &#8220;No, tuck your left leg behind.&#8221; She starts keeping a progress report with pleasure grades for each new arrangement. Eventually, logically, she splits this into [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[652,651],"class_list":["post-762","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-belinda","tag-ralph"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/762"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=762"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/762\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1937,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/762\/revisions\/1937"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=762"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=762"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=762"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}