Angela Lansbury is a master acupuncturist. She’ll paralyze you through the screen door of your cheaply appointed home.<\/p>\n
“When I was learning the art,” she’ll say, entering, “people would relate their fear of the needles.” She undoes the simple rubber-band slingshot. “I say, fear the needler.”<\/p>\n
Tell her you can identify her. Tell her to kill you now.<\/p>\n
“This needn’t end in tragedy,” she’ll say. “I’m going to remove an item from your house now: worthless to you, priceless to my employer. I can’t let you see it. Won’t you close your eyes?”<\/p>\n
Don’t. She’ll sigh, and pin them shut.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Angela Lansbury is a master acupuncturist. She’ll paralyze you through the screen door of your cheaply appointed home. “When I was learning the art,” she’ll say, entering, “people would relate their fear of the needles.” She undoes the simple rubber-band slingshot. “I say, fear the needler.” Tell her you can identify her. Tell her to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[1552],"class_list":["post-135","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-celebrities","tag-angela-lansbury"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/135"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=135"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/135\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2874,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/135\/revisions\/2874"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=135"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=135"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xorph.com\/anacrusis\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=135"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}