Day: February 1, 2004

Maria: Brendan, you really are getting good at frying sweet and sour chicken. I like eating it when you make it, and I appreciate your making dinner tonight. I just have one request.

Me: (standing in the blasted, grease-spattered wreckage of our kitchen) Yeah?

Maria: Don’t do it.

Calling All Puppies

Maria asks me to mention that her birthday is on Thursday, and ergo, someone should buy her a puppy. She wants a puppy. I request the same thing, with the addendum that you keep it at your own house, and also feed and water and take care of it and pay for its shots.

Just… just get your own puppy.