My Tuts
So last week (I know I’ve been terrible about updating this thing when I start out an entry “last week”), I had my first politics tutorial where I didn’t have an essay to turn in. Since I only had to do 6, I took a week off last week, and then this Tuesday, I won’t turn in an essay either. But then my last tutorial is this Friday, and I’ll turn in my last essay then, I may be presenting it too. It was really weird to not turn anything in, and I didn’t really say much either. The first 45 minutes, James, who presented his essay, focused on the second question of the two that were listed, and Simon and I had done more on the first, so we pretty much didn’t contribute much. Until Simon asked if we could talk about the first question too. So the last 15 minutes Simon talked about the second question because when he has something to say, it’s hard to get a word in. So I didn’t really participate, and even if I had had the chance, I don’t know how much I could have said because I didn’t have an essay in front of me. I had some notes, but I didn’t have a whole argument lined out. I guess this week will be the same, except there are two sub-topics, each of which has a couple questions. So I tried to make sure I know a little bit about each question, but I’m always afraid that as soon as I say something, my tutor will ask me a question that I didn’t cover in my reading and I won’t be able to answer it.
I was talking to Sarah (we met up at a coffee shop on Friday after I found out my race was canceled and I ran into her at the end of a lecture of mine and the beginning of a lecture of hers, it was fun) about how my tuts have been going and how I don’t really know how I am doing. In politics, I get a few comments on my essays, but not many and I haven’t gotten any marks. Sarah seems to think this is a good thing, but I don’t know. And I don’t talk that much except when I present my essay. Which I know you’re supposed to participate in the tuts, and it’s supposed to help you get used to arguing, but sometimes I wonder why. The exams are essays, not orals. I guess the tuts help you see your weaknesses in arguments. But I’m intimidated by my politics tutor and by the other two in my tut. I shouldn’t be, but I am. The tutor is a guy who has been studying this stuff for a long time and it is his specialty, and we’re supposed to argue with him? It’s a little crazy. I don’t think politics is my thing. I like the theory and the history, but I like reading about it, not arguing about it. Oh well, I’m in it now. I’m meeting with Suke on Friday to get my reports for my tutorials, so I guess I’ll find out what my tutor thinks of me then. I’m nervous about it. Suke might realize that whatever impressed her before isn’t really there, and I’m not that great of a student. I guess there’s not much I can do about it. Even if I participate a lot in this next tut, I think he will have already turned in my report, so it doesn’t matter.
Economics, on the other hand, is a completely different story. In those tuts, it’s more like a class and I do participate, even with other student Simon talking. Of course, sometimes tutor Simon (yeah it’s confusing with two Simons) calls on us or directs a question specifically at one of us. But he’s a D-Phil student, and people say they’re the best to have because they understand what we’re going through. And they’ve just been through other exams, so they can help on that end too. They’re also just less intimidating for me. I think we’re having one of Simon’s friends for the macro course next term. I’m not sure who my politics tutor will be. So this past tutorial was good. We had an essay, and we apparently all had practically the same essay because a really good answer was given in the book. But there were a couple things we were a little unclear on, so next week tutor Simon is going to look them up and let us know. Next week, we’ll discuss our essays, but then for the second half instead of having discussion questions, we’re going to go back and look at other questions we didn’t get to before or that we need more clarification on. I haven’t gotten any marks for this tut either, but I feel more confident about my report. I think I’ve proved that I know somewhat what I’m talking about whereas politics, I don’t know that I have. I’ve learned a lot, but I’ve probably learned just enough to be on an equal level with an everyday British citizen and not on the same level as an Oxford student studying more in-depth British politics. I guess that just means more work for over break, right? I guess I just have to wait and see what my reports say to judge how I’m doing so far. It’s nice not to have grades to worry about, but at the same it’s hard not to have grades to judge how I’m doing. It’s definitely a different education system, which I guess is what I asked for.